This is me: Milena Raicevic

THIS IS ME: Milena Raicevic

Never give up. Believe in yourself. That is something that has followed me throughout my life. When I was a kid, I used to walk two hours to get to the training, be there for two hours and then walk back home. I never gave up, no matter how hard it was or what the weather was like. Now when I look back on which path I took, I say to myself I would not be able to repeat it.

But for me, it was take it or leave it. I am stubborn and persistent. All the things I lived through made me who I am today.

My childhood affected a lot who I am today. I come from a big family, having five brothers and sisters. We were living modestly, and we did not have conditions for a good and easy life. We were living in a small space, in a house with just one room. But for us that was not a problem or any kind of obstacle to becoming good people and great athletes.

My twin sister Dragana was also playing handball until she was 18 and my brother Ivan used to play football. We were constantly competing in the house and that was carried over to the court. My family is my great support, especially in my handball beginnings.

We lost our mother too early: I was only 15, but she is still my superhero. While she was around, she taught me that it is perfectly fine to not have much but to fight for something big. She was my guide throughout my career. That period was very hard for me, but I managed to overcome it. My mother always wanted me to succeed in handball and life. I am proud I made her dream possible even though she was not here to witness it.

I started playing handball when I was 10. It all started in school as we kids were very active, playing dodgeball. My teacher Nada and the PE teacher saw I had a strong shot in my hand. They told me I should try handball at the Buducnost academy in Podgorica. The academy was led by Natasa Cignakova and Dragan Adzic. And I stayed to this day. It was a love at first sight with handball. Handball gave me the best moments of my career.

From that very first day, Dragan Adzic was there for me up until 2020 when he left Buducnost. He made me the player I am today; he and former club president Predrag Boskovic. Pedja also had a huge impact on my career path. When I lost my mother, in those moments, he was a father, a mother and a stronghold for me. He was the one who was holding me to the ground when we were on a high, both with Buducnost and the Montenegro national team.

Also, Nikola Petrovic made an impact. When I lost my mother, he asked my family to let me go with the youth national team. He knew it would be hard for both me and them, but it would give me an additional strength that would follow me throughout life. I think people who were surrounding me in my career are the reason why I am still here.

They also bounded me with Buducnost. I think Predrag Boskovic even did not allow other clubs to contact me [laughs]. He always had an opinion I was the player who should spend her whole career with Buducnost. The idea was that one player is the stronghold of Buducnost and for every new player that joins the squad. They thought I should be the one. And I regret nothing.

We won the EHF Champions League and have been competing in the top tier competition for many years. It is something that every player dreams of. That one year in Kastamonu happened after my birth and due to numerous things that were happening at the moment in Podgorica, I decided to move. It was a relaxed year in Kastamonu, filled with nice memories. I came back to Buducnost and Podgorica only a year later and I can say I returned to the place where my heart is.

My whole life has been connected to my town, my country. From family, friends, and love. All the best moments in my life are intertwined with it. Especially 2012. That was the most magical year. The perfect year for Montenegrin sport – we were European champions with Buducnost, won a silver medal at the Olympic Games in London, and finished it off with gold at the EHF EURO. If someone tried to write it down in advance, they would not be able to have it that perfect. Every player and everyone who was with us will forever be in my heart. Of course, I would love to repeat that year again, but it is hard to think we will ever have that chance and the possibility to have everything that perfectly.

Our silver from the Olympic Games was the first and, so far, the only Olympic medal for our country. I remember we were celebrating that medal like we won gold. It was something indescribable. We have been dreaming about it from day one. Every player hopes they will be an Olympian and represent their country in the best possible way and we made it even better. We had an amazing reception when we came back to Podgorica. I still have tears in my eyes just thinking about it. From the airport to the centre, everyone was out on the streets cheering.

I think people learned that Montenegrin women have a strong character. A few months later we showed it again. Two legends, Bojana Popovic and Maja Savic, retired and no one expected us to fight for a new medal. But we showed they were wrong. They did not know how much two of them taught us, gave us valuable advice and how to live and love handball. Once again, we met with Norway in the final but this time, the gold was ours.

Then, three years later we did it again with the club. Buducnost was once again at the top of Europe, another Champions League title. A new special memory and a great feeling, but to be honest, nothing can beat that 2012. I was lucky enough to play with players who taught me so many things. Bojana Popovic and Maja Savic are among them, they gave a lot to Montenegrin handball when they decided to come back home.

A lot of years passed by, and we could not achieve the same result – nor with Buducnost, nor with the Montenegro national team. With the national team, it always felt like we were missing out by one goal, or we had some other problems, but we knew we should never back down. We had a clear goal in mind and were living for the EHF EURO 2022 in front of our fans in Podgorica.

We knew our people love handball and I am very grateful they filled the venue to the last place for each game, giving us additional energy to play great. To have an opportunity to play at a major competition in your country is a feeling that is hard to explain. And to see them later in Skopje and Ljubljana just meant a lot to the whole team. We closed a 10-year circle with another medal, a bronze one and for me, to still be a part of the national team means a lot and I give 100 per cent on and off the court for it. For the team. For Buducnost and Montenegro.

I am one of those players who never chased the numbers and never gave special attention to the individual awards. That is also something I learned from Bojana when she came back to Buducnost. At the time, she was the player who played handball perfectly, she was the best. When a player like that said to me: “Miki, I never cared to be called the best. Those titles do not change anything. I know who I am, what I achieved and what I won.” I told myself, if a player like her does not care about it, why should you? Of course, I am proud of my 17 years in the Champions League, but they are not a priority. I would give some of those seasons to have more Champions League titles with my club and my teammates.

I hope I am their support just as my family is mine. Especially now my husband Marko and son Vuk. Marko and I are 10 years together now. To have stability and support at home is one of the most important things in a player’s life. When bad things happen, handball-related or not, I always knew he was the one waiting for me at home and that he would always be there for me. It was like that since day one and he never had a problem with me being a public person in a way, a successful woman.

I always wanted to be a mother. Losing my mom and never being able to show her what I have achieved, my goal was to feel that love and to show my kid what I am capable of.

I first wanted to take the time off to make my wish come true after 2016, but like always, you find different things and different situations coming at you and you keep pushing the plan. In 2017, I had a tendon rupture and I thought what better time to try to get pregnant? And it happened.

Unfortunately, due to the medicines I had to use and many other things, I had a miscarriage. That was an extremely tough period for me. When something you want just ends in tears.

We are not robots, we are not able to make things happen with the push of the button. All that left a mark on me, and it took some time to get pregnant again. I needed to get my head straight, so I went back to handball, played at a high level, and finally decided it was that time again in 2020.

In March 2021 my son Vuk was born. Since I became a mother, I realised how strong that love and bond are. How my mom lived for us. Vuk is my biggest motivation.

We know how tough it is for women to put their careers on hold to become mothers and how rare it is to find understanding and support in the club, from the people around you. But I was determined. I knew I wanted to give birth and then came back to handball. It changed me a lot. I look at things from a different perspective. Most clubs do not have understanding towards players who want to start a family. I think that is one of the best things that could happen in your life and players can come back only stronger – mentally and physically. We should see more support. Those things I feel even more now.

Everything just makes you stronger. Tougher. As I said, I am stubborn and persistent. I never look back. I always think positively and look towards new challenges. Those qualities gave me the opportunity to overcome every obstacle I had in my life. Every injury, from shoulder, knee etc. but the biggest one I challenged was my heart condition when I was young.

It was shocking for me and my family. Now when I am a mother, I can understand how hard that was for my family and my twin sister. I am happy they remained sane with all my health problems and injuries I had during my career. I had two cardiac ablations. I still don't know how I came back to handball like nothing happened. To win all the medals I won.

I have to say Buducnost was there for me in those moments and the support I received was a good ground for my comeback. That is why I will always be there for them, for handball and my people.

When retirement is coming close, it is hard to think about it and decide to do it. I have to be honest, I don’t plan on playing for a long time. Maybe one or two years; three is already tough but plausible. The only thing I decided is that I will retire when I want to, not when others think I should.

Of course, you have to think about what you want to do after it. In my head, I don’t see myself as a coach. I was offered an opportunity to be a coach while still playing but when I see how hard that job is, I want to have a couple of years without handball when I call it a day. I want to dedicate my time to my family, to be with them every day and enjoy some little things I have missed so far.

We will see what the future will brings. Maybe I should never say never, but I know what my priorities are right now.

And while still playing and enjoying it, I want to give my best on the court. To make new memories that will last for a lifetime.

Milena Raicevic
October 2023

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